July 11, 2012

future planning & present procrastinating

{picture taken by mackenzie phillips}
 for some reason my thoughts have been consumed by all the things i'm going to do when i graduate college.  get a dog.  get a house.  maybe buy a new (used) car.  but all of these things require money.  when i reach this part of the fantasy, it makes me scared.  in this not so distant future, i have absolutely no idea what occupation will pay the bills.  i know what i think would be perfect for me and then i second guess myself because ultimately i'm not the one that will be deciding, God will.  i need to get over the fact that God will work this out and NOT me.

what i'm secretly thinking about this week, has been interrupted repeatedly by what i should be focusing on, reality.  2 assignments due friday, an exam sunday, the youth camp video that is being presented sunday, leading worship at my church sunday, working all week, our church's VBS, the upcoming fair that i am suppose to be helping with, my mother being stressed and the absolutely nothing that i can do about it.  the list goes on & on.  one of my great friends once told me to not get caught up in the future so as to miss the present.  she's probably reading this, so i thank you friend.  i need to stop procrastinating on the tasks that need me now rather than dwell on future blessing and worries that may never come to pass.

prayers gladly accepted for the "mackenzie needs to get through her present life" reality check!


  1. haha that last little line is too cute. I love everything you said here. I'm pretty sure I went through that same phase. and continue going through that phase. every time I feel like I get a plan in order, God steps in and is like, "um, let's do it this way instead" and I'm thrown for a whirl. then I have to remember that He's in control and my plan is probably flawed, where as His is perfect. it's kind of hard for me to let go of the reigns sometimes but maybe that's why He challenges me to that so much. I hope everything works out for you and that you can find a way to enjoy right now. and ultimately, I discovered after college that all that planning you do about 'life after college' is really a waste of time because it will mostly likely happen nothing like you planned. :)

    sending prayers your way sweet girl!

  2. i got the house, dog, and stuff before i got married. or a job. and then i moved and now i have a house but i don't live in it. it's hard to get those things early and then have them taken! the worst! it will come to you in time - but i understand - i'm impatient to get a house too! (i still have one of my two dogs, i'm anxxious for them to live together again!) and good luck - you will get through!

    <3 katherine
    crave jewelry necklace giveaway // of corgis & cocktails